Started to learn a new piano piece last night. I rarely know pieces by their title – I start playing them and then recognize them, often from a Looney Tunes cartoon or some movie.
Last night, I started playing the traditional French children’s song Au Clair de la Lune. And I laughed and laughed when I recognized it. Then teared up.
It’s the piano piece that evil little Rhoda plays in the film The Bad Seed (1956). Mom referenced that movie a lot. She would joke about it, or comment whenever it was on TCM. It’s one of those movies that has made me think of her when it’s on, and I’d text her to let her know. Which I did for Gypsy (1963) and Harvey (1950) as well, two movies she loathed.
How fun it would have been to learn this piece and then surprise Mom with it on a video.
I haven’t decided if I’m going to keep posting videos of me playing. They were mostly for Mom.
I delight when things show up to remind me of my Mom, or anyone else I miss, but I’m not going to assume it’s any sort of sign. I don’t believe in signs from departed loved ones. I know a lot of people choose to believe that, and if you do, I’m not going to try to talk you out of it. I know you find comfort in the idea. But if Houdini couldn’t figure it out, then it’s not possible to communicate to the dead, nor receive communications from them.
Love of movies was something we shared, though I loved completely different eras than her. Mom loved movies from the 1950s. Stalag 17 (1953), Roman Holiday (1953), Imitation of Life (1959), Some Like It Hot (1959), Rear Window (1954) and Rebel Without a Cause (1955) were favorites. Most were released before she graduated from high school – the happiest time of her life.
Mom was an enigma. Each of her kids had a completely different relationship with her. I’m not sure if we each described her that our descriptions would be all that similar. I spent a lot of time with her, but it wasn’t in conversation: it was watching a movie, or sitting in a floor stuffing envelopes for a bulk mail for one of her jobs, or sitting quietly at an event she needed to attend, or tagging along while she shopped or ran errands. Mom was always doing something outside of her day job, and since she wouldn’t let me stay home alone until I was probably 14 or so, I would go too. When I started doing things outside of school – trying to play sports (I was SO bad), being a part of school plays, singing in the choir – she wasn’t there for a lot of it: she was off doing all that she wanted or needed to do. Our competing schedules didn’t allow for her to always be out in the audience or small crowd, but that also just wasn’t my mom: she rarely liked being in an audience or crowd.
Anyway…. I’ll learn Au Clair de la Lune. But I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to play it as fast as Rhoda.
Postscript: here’s my latest, and probably last, imperfect piano recital, at least for a long, long while.
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